Small Scale Trouble
by Legend Seeker
Summary: BEING REVISEDHooray! LSeeker is going to get rid of the ending and change it! Expect a lot more chaos now. RobStar BBRae.
1. Double Preparations

Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans. I do own Jack and Fayrii Lijaro. And I partially own Whitefire and Bluefire. Warning: This is a sequel to Times That Test Souls, which is a sequel to Never Too Late, which is a sequel to Of Devotion and Love, which is a sequel to A Simple Boy. I can't stop writing sequels, can I?  
Chapter I: Double Preparations  
All was quiet in the Tower. Cyborg was humming to himself as he cooked dinner. Beast Boy was trying to beat Robin's high score. Starfire was watching the stars. Robin was attacking the punching bag (and losing). Raven was meditating in her spot by the window. As for the Titans' friends, Fayrii and Jack, they were meditating.  
"Hey Fayrii and Jack?" Beast Boy started. The two Half-faeries opened one eye. "How come your powers are different than Ravens?"  
"Our psy is from another dimension," Fayrii stated.  
"Therefore it has different properties," Jack continued.  
"All psy has some basic similarities."  
"Yet since ours is taught by Faeries,"  
"It is more deadly,"  
"But it is also more resistant to emotion,"  
"Yet the results if it loses control are more dangerous." Fayrii finished, and the boys closed their eyes again.  
"Um, I have another question," Beast Boy said. Fayrii sighed, turned around, and faced BB.  
"What is it?" Fayrii asked irritably.  
"How does your magic work?"  
"Magic is an arcane force that with practiced force, can be manipulated. It is divided into two groups: Light and Dark, or White and Black. Each side has four more sides: Earth, Fire, Water, and Air. Light magic contains the good part of the four. Dark contains the destructive part," Fayrii explained, and turned again to meditate.  
Robin came into the room, sweating, and asked, "Fayrii, Jack, could you come with me?"  
Mistaking him for BB, Fayrii and Jack stood up and flew in the air over a cowering Beast Boy. They yelled at him simultaneously, "ARE YOU BLIND OR JUST CRAZY?"  
"Uh, guys?" Robin started. Both brothers turned towards him. "I was the one that asked."  
"Oh," Jack said, and turned back to BB. "Sorry, BB." Beast Boy nodded, and returned to his game. Robin, Fayrii, and Jack went into Robin's room. Once they were in there, Robin got down on his knees and clasped his hands, begging the bewildered princes.  
"I really need you to do something for me," Robin begged, "Puh-lease! Please please please please please please please please please please please!"  
"Robin, you haven't even told us what you need," Jack answered. Robin stopped and got up, trying to save his dignity.  
"Yeah, Robin, what could make you do that?" Fayrii asked, one eyebrow arched.  
"Well, okay. Tomorrow I'm going out to get some things for...something. I really need you to distract Starfire and keep her here," Robin explained.  
"What things? For what?" Jack asked.  
"Nothing," Robin answered, trying to lie.  
"You know, we could read your mind and tell Starfire..." Fayrii started. Robin gave up.  
"Okay! I'm going to propose to Starfire," Robin spoke. Instead of being teased as he thought would happen, there was a pat on the back (well, to Robin it was more of a two hundred ton weight smashing his spine).  
"Alright Robin! About time!" Fayrii said, smiling.  
"We shall help you prepare," Jack agreed. Relief spread across Robin's face.  
"Thanks, I was about to lose it," Robin sighed.  
"Hey, don't worry," the brothers answered together, and left to see if dinner was ready.  
Robin stood in his room a moment longer, then went outside. He sensed Starfire coming closer. I must feel normal, he told himself. Yet when he saw her, he felt a smile on his face.  
"Lover Robin, are you okay? I felt you were panicking. Did Cyborg and Beast Boy blow up the kitchen?" Starfire asked. Robin swallowed.  
"No, everything's fine," he assured her. Starfire sensed he was lying about something, but before she could ask, an explosion could be heard coming from the kitchen.  
"Now everything's not fine," he joked, earning a small giggle. Running towards the kitchen, the suspects were who they suspected. Cyborg and Beast Boy were arguing again. Fayrii and Jack stood in the corner wide- eyed, covered in dough with BB, Cyborg, and the rest of the kitchen.  
"I'VE TOLD YOU A MILLION TIMES; NOBODY WANTS YOUR STINKING TOFU!" Cyborg shouted at the changeling.  
"THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SLIP MEAT INSIDE MY TOFU DOGS!" Beast Boy shouted back. Robin stepped in between them to try to stop them. It didn't work. The two continued to yell at each other.  
"Are you two fighting again?" Raven asked, gliding again. Beast Boy immediately stopped fighting and put on his best smile.  
"Heh heh, of course not Raven, Me and Cyborg are just having an adult conversation," Beast boy commented, leaning on Cyborg.  
"Exactly what I thought," Raven replied, smiling. She turned back around and left. Beast Boy wiped sweat off his forehead and sighed. Cyborg snickered, and was given a nice cuff by Jack, who was standing on Fayrii's shoulders.  
Robin sighed, and picked up a mop. Starfire grabbed a broom, while Beast Boy and Cyborg started to precook dinner. Fayrii and Jack cleaned themselves off, and began to help Starfire and Robin.  
After dinner, Beast Boy came to Fayrii and Jack, and asked, "Uh, could I see you guys?" Fayrii and Jack arched an eyebrow at each other, and followed BB to his and Raven's room. It was dark, with items of Raven and BB strung about it.  
So, who are we gonna prank this time?" Jack asked excitedly. Fayrii shook his head at his little brother.  
"And I thought you were supposed to be kind while an Initiate of the Light," Fayrii mumbled.  
"Actually, guys, I'm not pranking anybody," Beast Boy responded, scratching the back of his head. Immediately, Jack put the back of his hand to BB's forehead.  
"Are you feeling okay?" Jack asked, while Fayrii took his temperature.  
"Dude, I'm fine, just, could you make the barrier quick?" Beast Boy asked. Fayrii eyes turned blue, and a blue psychic barrier was created around them, sealing off any attempts Raven might make to eavesdrop.  
Outside her room, Raven folded her arms and pouted, before going into the basement.  
"Thanks, guys. Could you do a favor for me? Could you keep Raven busy at the tower?" Beast Boy asked.  
"Huh, keeping Raven at the tower is the easy part," Fayrii mumbled, then asked, "What for?"  
"Um, so I can go get moped?" Beast Boy tried. Both Half-faeries crossed their arms.  
"Okay, I'm gonna go get a ring to propose to Raven? Beast Boy asked, slightly closing his eyes, expecting a hit across the head.  
"Alright, we'll do it for that," Jack mused, as though he and Fayrii had just remembered something funny. BB calmed down.  
"Thanks," he said, and left to play video games some more. Fayrii and Jack teleported up onto the roof, still in a barrier.  
"Strange, who would have suspected this?" Fayrii mused to Jack.  
"Should we tell anyone to expect a double proposal?" Jack pondered.  
"Nah, let's just watch and see what happens. Besides, it's supposed to be a secret," Fayrii answered, putting a finger to his lips. Jack laughed the immaturity of his older brother. Fayrii removed the barrier, and both went downstairs to spar in the gym. 


	2. Distractions

Chapter II: Distractions  
Robin got up early the next day, intent on getting done what he wished to do. He quietly got out of bed, kissed Starfire on the forehead, and left. As he got outside, he started humming. He jumped on his motorcycle and drove along the underwater path to Jump City, and parked his bike outside a video game store, in case Starfire came looking for him. He then began to walk towards his destination.  
Beast Boy's sneak-away went as well as Robin's. He jumped out of bed, changed into a bird, and proceeded to fly away.  
By the time Cyborg, Fayrii and Jack were calmly eating, both girls were looking around the tower.  
"Have any of you seen Robin? He is not to be found anywhere," Starfire asked.  
"Robin? He uh, went to go get a video game," Fayrii answered, suddenly losing control of his voice.  
"Yeah, that's right," Jack agreed. Starfire looked at them suspiciously. Raven poked her head in.  
"What about Beast Boy?" Raven asked.  
"If I know him, he's probably gettin' that nasty tofu!" Cyborg said through a mouthful of waffles.  
"Actually, Beast Boy went with Robin," Jack said. Raven didn't believe him, and stared into his eyes, eye-level. Jack simply smiled back. After about a minute, Raven pulled her gaze away.  
"Perhaps we should go accompany them and see the mall of shopping?" Starfire asked Raven.  
"No!" Fayrii and Jack said at once. Both girls and Cyborg looked at them.  
"They, uh, wanted to be alone," Jack answered. "Right big brother?"  
"Yeah, right," Fayrii assured.  
"While I don't like how they're acting, Starfire," Raven started, "I agree we shouldn't go after them. I don't think that the four of us at the mall would work. I'll be in my room." Raven left, somewhat doubting the brothers.  
"Hey, how about we play volleyball?" Fayrii asked, trying to cover- up. Starfire brightened.  
"Glorious! Let us volley the ball! I shall go find it!" she said, before flying off. Fayrii and Jack both sighed with relief when she left. Cyborg raised an eyebrow.  
"Now what are you two hidin'?" Cyborg asked in his suspicious tone. Fayrii and Jack tensed up again.  
"Nothing," they both said at once. Cyborg arched his eyebrow more.  
"I know when one of my friends are hiding something? Now what are you hiding? What, are Robin and Beast Boy trying to prank the girls?"  
"No, you know they wouldn't do that," Fayrii answered.  
"Then what are you four hiding? Robin isn't with Beast Boy, is he?"  
"No, they just left, we just said that to reassure the girls," Jack answered.  
"No, you're hiding something."  
"Look, we can honestly swear we are not hiding anything," Fayrii answered.  
"Oh. Then how many things are you hiding?" Cyborg asked, catching on. He still was extremely suspicious.  
"Are you going to leave us alone?" Jack asked.  
"Not till I know what you're hiding," Cyborg answered. Before the boys could answer, Starfire came into the kitchen with the volleyball, and Fayrii made a hand-signal to Cyborg that meant if-you-let-her-or-Raven-onto- something-you're-gonna-die-painfully. The four went onto the roof to play.  
"Fayrii, something is wrong with Robin," Starfire said before they began.  
"What?" Fayrii asked.  
"I feel...I think it is called paranoia."  
"Isn't Robin always paranoid?"  
"Yes, but he feels more so."  
"Well, he's out in the city, probably expecting Slade to jump out of the sun."  
"I guess you are right," Starfire whispered, and she flew onto one side of the net with Cyborg. Fayrii and Jack got on theirs. Cyborg served the ball high into the air, and Jack set it up near the top of the net, and Fayrii flipped forward, spiking the ball into ground on Cy and Star's side with his tail. Jack picked up the ball and served it. Starfire bumped it back, and Fayrii jumped back, setting it to them. Cyborg jumped up and tried to spike it. Jack was right there, however, and bumped it into the air, to be spiked by Fayrii into the ground.  
After two more hours, the four walked into the living room. Fayrii and Jack had won 8039782789243578957891497824109758924797625976762590867259762590672956792567 2976927627624907629056729805675690576290768924769027689067290765892789678956 2789789256789789256789789789789789789789789567897890092768925710406345710713 4971390761590374913963190879381671389564 to 0.  
"Man, I didn't even know it was possible to get that many points," Cyborg commented, worn out and sitting on the couch. Starfire was wiping the sweat off her face with a towel. Fayrii and Jack were sitting calmly on the ceiling.  
Raven walked into the room. "I'm going out," she put simply. "Starfire, I don't know why I'm saying this, but, do you want to go to the mall?"  
Starfire nodded happily. Jack and Fayrii stepped up, saying, "May we accompany you?"  
Raven looked at them suspiciously. "Give me one reason why I should let you two come," she tested. Fayrii and Jack held up a 278550458904578045789078947893478978943278901578915789457897894 pound block on each hand. Raven rolled her eyes.  
"Alright," she said. Cyborg stood up.  
"I gonna go recharge," he said, and left. Raven and Starfire left the tower, with Fayrii and Jack right behind them.  
Throughout the time at the mall, Jack and Fayrii had trouble keeping all the things the girls bought, and hiding Robin or BB when they came along. Fortunately, the boys helped a bit by hiding quickly. By the time the girls and the two brothers got home, Robin's grunts could be heard coming from the gym, and Beast Boy and Cyborg were playing video games. Fayrii and Jack sorted the items to who it belonged to, put them in their rooms, and went up on the roof, to go bungee-jumping.  
To themselves, Robin and Beast Boy sighed happily, glad that was over. But now the harder part was coming. Yet Fayrii and Jack knew what was happening, and let events run their course. For Fate has better surprises than Half-faeries. 


	3. Will You Marry Me?

Chapter III: Will You Marry Me?  
Robin breathed very deeply. He stood outside his and Starfire's room. Starfire was inside, he could sense her. He felt so nervous, and yet, so free. In other words, Robin was either starting to feel that chugged freezie or he was falling for Starfire all over again.  
Robin took another deep breath, and raised his hand to knock on the door. Just before he did, the door opened to show Starfire smiling at him.  
"Robin you do not need permission to access your living quarters," Starfire teased. Robin smiled weakly.  
"Hey uh, Starfire, do you want to go to a restaurant?" Robin asked while his voice was cracking a bit. It caught Starfire by a little surprise, but she did not understand why he was so nervous this time when he had asked her out before so easily many other times.  
"Certainly, Robin, I would love to go," Starfire answered. Robin's face showed panic, but she still felt anxiousness from him. She moved to the side, and Robin stepped into the closet, grabbed a change of clothes, and walked into the bathroom. Starfire also grabbed her change of clothes and started to dress into her purple dress.  
When Robin came out, he was in his tux, except it was new (since he ripped his old one in Date with Destiny). He put his arms around hers, and they walked downstairs. Cyborg was at the front door, working on something. He turned and just had to see Robin with Starfire. He chuckled to himself.  
"We're going out," Robin explained as he and Starfire continued to walk by.  
"Right, I'll see you love birds later in bed, heh heh," Cyborg almost chanted.  
"At least Robin is in love, Cyborg," Starfire said as she put her head on Robin's shoulder. They left the Titans Tower.  
Cyborg whispered to himself, "Not that you know."  
  
Raven sat meditating in her room, feeling calm. Until she pried about the tower with her senses and found Beast Boy walking in circles outside her door, muttering to himself. She immediately knew what he wanted, since that was the only thing that drove him crazy. Beast Boy never was good at asking her to dates, even after two years. But then, he had a reason, since when she was in a bad mood her reaction wasn't good.  
Better save him the trouble, Raven thought, and stood up. She walked over to the door and opened it. Beast Boy was walking in circles muttering to himself still. Finally, he stopped and went to knock on the door, when he realized that Raven was standing right there, wearing a rare smile on her lips.  
Beast Boy chuckled slightly, and swallowed. "So, will you?" he asked, knowing that she had seen what he was going to ask already. Raven pretended to think about, watching Beast Boy's face go crazy. It was fun to watch the different colors his face went.  
"Yes," Raven spoke, and BB sighed happily, glad she wasn't in a bad mood. Beast Boy walked into their room with her, and he put on his tux, while Raven put on a black dress. Beast Boy enjoyed watching Raven wear a dress, one because she made him drool, and two because it was the only other thing she owned. At least that he knew about. Raven had bought a dress on Tamaran with Blackfire and had kept it hidden from everyone.  
The two passed by Cyborg who chuckled as they passed.  
"We'll be gone for a while," Raven put simply.  
"Riiight," Cyborg said, while thinking, Both couples going out the same night? I wonder if it's a prank.  
Meanwhile, Fayrii and Jack were returning from their bungee jumping expedition.  
"Well, now we know that we have to use a bungee cord that's half the length of what we're jumping," a beat-up Jack said.  
"Yeah, who knew that they stretched twice their length?" Fayrii asked.  
"I would," Cyborg said, jumping out of the shadows and grabbing both boys' tails. Fayrii and Jack held still, since their tails were their vulnerable spot. Cyborg led them to the living room couch, duct-taped them to chairs, and stood with plasma cannon ready.  
"Alright, now what are ya hiding?" Cyborg asked.  
"Nothing!" Jack yelled. Cyborg blasted him.  
"Hey, don't blast my..." Fayrii was cut off as Cyborg blasted him.  
"Now what are ya hiding?" Cyborg asked again.  
"Nothing...anymore," Fayrii lied.  
"What's that supposed to mean?"  
"Starfire, Robin, Beast Boy, and Raven..." Fayrii began.  
"Are going to..." Jack continued.  
"Enjoy their dates,"  
"We weren't to tell you because..."  
"They didn't want you teasing them,"  
"Are you happy now?" Jack asked.  
"Alright, you win," Cyborg said, and turned on the game station, leaving the two Half-faeries to get themselves out.  
  
Meanwhile, Starfire was enjoying spending dinner alone with Robin. She was eating a mushroom soup, while Robin, being the evil combat master he is, ordered a 10 oz. Steak. For some reason, he seemed not to focus on his meal like usual. She sensed he was right there, but he felt like he was far away. Robin was probably worried that she wasn't enjoying herself.  
However, that only scarcely crossed Robin's panicking mind. Perhaps I should give you a taste of what he was thinking:  
Is she alright is she enjoying herself what if this goes wrong what if I mess up what if she says no what if something happens before I can ask what if she thinks it's a joke Is she alright is she enjoying herself what if this goes wrong what if I mess up what if she says no what if something happens before I can ask what if she thinks it's a joke Is she alright is she enjoying herself what if this goes wrong what if I mess up what if she says no what if something happens before I can ask what if she thinks it's a joke Is she alright is she enjoying herself what if this goes wrong what if I mess up what if she says no what if something happens before I can ask what if she thinks it's a joke...  
Is that enough for you?  
  
Beast Boy wasn't in much better condition. Raven knew something was bothering him. She didn't know what, since he seemed to usually enjoy her favorite café. Slowly and secretly, Raven decided to pry about in his mind. BB sensed her and cut her off, using a technique that she had taught him.  
"Heh heh, and you say I don't learn anything," Beast Boy teased. Raven rolled her eyes and rested her head on her hand, propping it up with her elbow.  
"Your mind's too much of a mess to read anyway," Raven shot. BB's smile disappeared, and he frowned at Raven. She giggled ever slightly, which gave him a quick scare. After Raven finished her tea, Beast Boy decided. He took her out to one of Raven's most favorite places: the haunted house of Jump City. It gave Beast Boy the spooks sometimes, and Raven knew he was up to something.  
"Beast Boy, why are we here?" Raven asked, and was surprised to see Beast Boy trembling slightly. "Beast Boy, are you alright?" she asked.  
"I'm fine," he answered, his voice level and serious. He turned and faced her, and grabbed her hand. He took down to one knee, looked her in the eye, and took out a small black box, opened it, and said five words, "Raven, will you marry me?"  
  
Robin ran through the park, looking for a place to hide. Have to hide, can't be found, after me, and must hide. Robin dove into a bush, and waited quietly, barely breathing. Suddenly, a purple blur slammed into Robin's back, picking him up. It dropped off at the bridge by the river, and Starfire landed next to a surprised Robin.  
"I have found you, Lover Robin," Starfire giggled, having enjoyed their game of hide-and-seek. Robin smiled and he stood up next to her. They both looked out over the pond. Robin thought about what he was going to do, then stopped, realizing that it was make him panic.  
Starfire sensed his anxiety, and asked, "What is the matter, Lover Robin?"  
Robin took the opportunity, saying, "I need to ask you a question, Star."  
Starfire's breath caught. She realized that they were alone, out in the park. She turned to face Robin. Not a lot of color was in his face, and he felt a bit frightened. Starfire caught her breath again, hoping it was what she thought.  
Slowly, Robin took one knee, held hand, took out a red box, opened it, and in a level tone, asked her what she always wanted to hear from him, "Will you marry me Star?"  
  
Raven's world came to an instant halt, and she forgot about everything except for herself, Beast Boy, and what he had said. He had said those five words, words every girl dreamed of hearing sometime in her life. Raven had believed it would never happen to her, until she and BB confessed two years ago. She had steadily believed that it would happen.  
And now it had.  
Taking a deep breath, Raven answered his question, "Yes." Beast Boy's face showed relief, and then joy. Jumping up like a two-year old, He grabbed Raven gently, and kissed her.  
  
Starfire stood, still holding her breath. Robin had finally said it. She had always liked him ever since she had met him, and taught her to speak English. He had always been there for her, always taking care of him. And now he had said it.  
Starfire answered with happiness in her voice, "I will glad fully marry you." Robin once panicky face vanished, to be replaced by one of pure joy. He picked her up, and kissed her long and good. 


	4. Congratulations

Chapter IV: Congratulations  
Cyborg stood out by the front door, having just talked to Blackfire over the phone. He knew they would back eventually. As for the Lijaro brothers, they were in the living room, discussing magic and battle strategies for armies.  
The front door opened to reveal Raven and Beast Boy, with Raven resting her hand on Beast Boy's shoulder. Cyborg was about to snicker, until he saw a ring on Raven's finger.  
The biotic man stood up, saying, "Beast Boy, you..." He had trouble finishing that sentence.  
"He proposed, and I accepted," Raven finished. Cyborg stood speechless for a while, and then answered.  
"Well, good-job guys! I was wondering when you would!" Cyborg congratulated. Raven and Beast Boy continued on.  
Ten minutes later, a flustered Robin and Starfire came in through the door, Starfire wearing her ring. Once again, Cyborg's reactions were the same.  
"Congratulations, lover bird!" Cyborg said, patting Robin on the shoulder. Starfire giggled as they went up to their room.  
Cyborg sat down, thinking to himself, well, who have thought? Robin and Beast Boy proposed...wait a minute, two proposals at once? Alright, this time they've gone too far.  
Cyborg marched over to the living room, where Fayrii sat with his brother. Cyborg grabbed the microphone to the tower, and yelled into it with rage, "Everyone get their butt down here and line up!"  
Everyone hustled down and lined up next the Lijaro brothers. Cyborg paced in front of them.  
"Alright, this prank was too much. Give it up; two of these couldn't happen at once!" Cyborg shouted. The four titans looked around confused. Fayrii and Jack stood silent. Then the four titans noticed both Raven and Starfire had a ring.  
Robin and Beast Boy went up to each other at the same time and spoke simultaneously, "You proposed? Great job! Wait, at the same time?" They turned to Cyborg during the last sentence, who shrugged his shoulders. Raven and Starfire were talking to each other.  
"You mean...you're not faking it?" Cyborg asked. Both boys shook their heads.  
"Wait," Robin said, causing everyone to look at him, "If none of us expected it, only two people could have."  
Everyone turned to face Fayrii. Jack pointed at his older brother.  
"Why didn't you tell us this was going to happen?" Starfire asked.  
"Robin and Beast Boy both asked us to keep both girls distracted," Fayrii began (Raven went Aha!), "but we agreed to keep it a secret. So we let events run their course."  
Starfire hugged Raven. "Friend Raven! We get to be married to Beast Boy and Robin at the same time!" she shouted excitedly. Raven was thinking, oh no now we're gonna be in a bright room and I'll have to wear white oh crap.  
Robin and Beast Boy grinned to each other. Cyborg bonked their heads together.  
"However, Cyborg, I've found out a secret of your own, without any help," Robin said with that evil grin and tone. Cyborg started to sweat.  
"Don't know what you're talking about," he said as all six turned to him.  
"What is it, Lover Robin?" Starfire asked. Cyborg seemed to tense up.  
"Why don't you ask your sister, Blackfire?" Robin asked. Cyborg started to panic and run, but the Half-faeries held him fast. Starfire took out a transmitter from her belt, and put in a sequence. Everyone waited.  
Blackfire's voice came through static, "What is it, little sister?"  
"Blackfire, what is Cyborg's secret that you know about?" Starfire asked. By now, everyone knew what it was Robin had found out, but wanted to hear it from Blackfire or Cyborg.  
There was a long pause. "I don't know what you mean," Blackfire answered.  
"Yes you do, sister," Starfire pressed.  
"No I don't."  
"Alright already! One of you admit it, or I'll send it to every planet I can think of!" Fayrii threatened. Another long pause.  
"Alright, I'm............going out with Blackfire," Cyborg spoke.  
"He's right," Blackfire's voice hinted defeat.  
Robin grinned, Raven stood there, Starfire congratulated her sister, Beast Boy laughed, and the two brothers leaned on Cyborg with that grin that says aha-aha-it's-out.  
Starfire closed her transmission, and Robin went up to bed with Starfire. Raven put her head on BB's shoulder, and they walked away. Cyborg was left looking at the two brothers.  
"Hey, I'm gonna go recharge," Cyborg said.  
"You'll need it. After all, won't we have to pick a chapel or place and buy stuff?" Fayrii asked. Then the three boys realized what that means, and went to bed really quickly, awaiting the nightmare tomorrow. The next morning, Starfire woke up Robin, jumping excitedly. Robin got up, groaning at getting up so early.  
"What is it, Star?" he yawned.  
"Today we must get ready for our wedding!" Starfire beamed. Gradually, Robin changed, and Starfire grabbed Robin's wrist, dragging him to the living room. Raven was there, meditating, Beast Boy was sitting next to her, imitating her, Cyborg was stretching, and Fayrii was checking things off with Jack.  
"Psychic powers," Fayrii asked. They tested them  
"Check," Jack said.  
"Magic powers."  
"Check."  
"Hand-to-hand training."  
"Check."  
"Oxygen tanks."  
"Check."  
"Carrying gloves.  
"Check."  
"Squad To-be-doomed is ready to go," Fayrii reported. Robin rolled his eyes at the two.  
"Let's go Titans," Robin ordered, and they left Titans Tower. First Stop, a place. Starfire insisted on a big, bright room. Raven wanted a small, dark room. Starfire won, and the four decided to get married in a cathedral.  
Next Stop was preparation, such as dresses, and priests. Starfire got a new dress, Raven remembered the one she had kept hidden, and didn't buy one. Robin and Beast Boy were given new tuxes, and Fayrii and Jack were also made to get one. Then came for the cake. It was an interesting order, considering two couples were getting married at once. What no one realized that while the cake was being ordered, Fayrii, Jack, Cyborg each got a digital camera.  
Finally, Fayrii was asked to be the priest. He refused, saying that was Jack's area. Jack agreed, and Fayrii was chosen for organist.  
The next thing to do was find guests and a date. Robin immediately decided not to have Slade, but let at least the HIVE participate, as long as they didn't screw things up (Jinx said weddings were too romantic to mess up, Mammoth was easy to persuade, and Gizmo said it would be worth it to be able to be out of jail for a while and not be hunted). No to anyone's surprise (but to Robin's fear), Starfire invited her family. Cyborg asked Fix-it to come (Perhaps the wedding will need repairs). Thunder and Lightning were invited, but Robin didn't invite Batman, because Robin said he would be slaughtered by him.  
Finally, it was done. The sun was setting, and the wedding was in a week. The eight teenagers went to Titans Tower and headed off to sleep. 


	5. The Wedding

Chapter V: The Wedding  
At last, it was time. Robin had a strange lumpy feeling in his throat, although he didn't know why. He was the one who had asked, but why did he feel frightened. Perhaps it was just a feeling of nervousness. Beast Boy just stood there, mumbling to himself and pacing in circles. Apparently, it helped him, though Robin wasn't sure it was his mumbling as much as his IQ.  
Cyborg was unfortunately, wearing a tux. Both girls had insisted on it after BB and Robin had made him best man. Starfire and Raven were talking to themselves, wondering how the boys were feeling, trying to lose the feeling of anxiousness.  
Then everyone remembered the wedding was tomorrow, and that this was just the rehearsal.  
"You know Robin and Beast Boy, how come the girls made me wear a suit when you guys get to dress normal?" Cyborg asked as the three of them stood by Jack.  
"They want you to get used to the feeling of it," Robin answered. Fayrii looked over to Jack, and Jack nodded to him. Fayrii began to play the organ, and Raven and Starfire walked down the isle, looking quite relaxed.  
Suddenly, Jack held up his hand, asking everyone to stop. "What's the matter, Jack?" Fayrii asked, as everyone came up.  
"I don't think you guys should have made me have those ten corndogs," Jack said, and ran outside all the way to the dock, to empty his stomach.  
Everyone still in the cathedral looked to Fayrii. "Well, you're gonna have to be the priest for the rehearsal," Robin said. Fayrii's face turned pale.  
"What? I can't do that, I've never practiced," Fayrii tried to get out of it.  
"Please Fayrii?" Starfire asked, making a puppy-dog pout.  
"Pleeeeze?" Raven asked as well (but with no face). Fayrii dropped his head and agreed.  
This time, the girls walked down the isle with no music. As the girls approached, Fayrii thought rapidly, trying to think of what to say. He'd never practiced it, thinking he would never have to. Yet here he was. Finally, Fayrii remembered something he could say. Those words came from a movie he had seen called, Princess Bride.  
So Fayrii took a deep breath, and began an exact mimic of the priest, "Mawige. Mawige is what bwings up togetha, today. And Wove, twue wove, a dweam within a dweam. Blah blah blah you may kiss the bride," Fayrii said when Starfire and Raven had reached the alter and had turned toward their boys. Fayrii jumped over to the organ and began to play just before they kissed.  
They went home and slept. Because the even harder part was coming: the actual marriage.  
The next day, everyone was awake at dawn. Everyone ate breakfast, and were about to leave, except that someone looked at the clock. So for 6 hours, they wandered aimlessly around the tower. Fayrii and Jack began playing a magic game around 3 A.M. and Raven joined in shortly afterwards. The object of the game was to pass the ball of magic to the right, and stop keeping it alive. The person who it was being passed to had to begin maintaining it right when the other person let go. If you messed up or missed, you were out until a winner was chosen. The other titans joined, and were able to maintain the magic ball, they just couldn't create it. Pretty soon, everyone was sitting in a circle, passing a magic ball around.  
6 A.M. finally came. Immediately, Fayrii, Jack, and Cyborg put on their tuxes; Robin, BB, Raven, and Starfire got their clothes and all of them either flew or took the T-car to the cathedral. Once they were there, Robin and Beast Boy put on their suits. They walked to Jack, who had been told he wasn't supposed to wear a tux. The twelve-year-old had gleefully shredded it, and was now wearing his normal white clothes with a white cloak, the hood down. Fayrii was getting everything ready: bringing the cake, setting up the cameras the grooms and brides didn't know about, and standing by the door.  
At 6:30, guests began appearing. The HIVE appeared first, and with one look at Fayrii's razor-sharp claws, they decided they really shouldn't cause any trouble. Then came Fix-it, and Fayrii had to literally drag him to stop him from "fixing anything." Following them came Thunder and Lightning, who realized that they were going to have to sit still for a long time. Starfire's family entered afterwards. Everyone else (if I forgot anyone) came soon afterwards.  
By 6:57, Starfire stood in her dress behind the doors. Everyone was seated and waiting. In three minutes Fayrii would start playing. Starfire was wearing a white dress, with a silk underline. A (what is it called?), um, the white thingy brides wear was on her head. "I wonder where Raven is," Starfire asked herself. Right on cue, Raven walked out.  
Raven was wearing a white dress (A sign of the apocalypse! AHHHH!) that was made with Tamaranian white silk, with white gloves, and white heels. It looked entirely like a different Raven, and Raven's cheeks were red.  
"Raven! Your Tamaranian dress is beautiful on you!" Starfire whispered, causing Raven's cheeks to burn brighter. When the music began to play, Raven's cheeks returned to her normal color, and the doors opened.  
The flower girl came down the isle (with whoever else does, it's 9 years since I've been to one, give me a break). Then Starfire and Raven came down the isle side-by-side. Robin and Beast Boy seemed to be using all their strength not to faint when they saw the girls. Cyborg was paying attention to Blackfire, while Jack and Fayrii seemed to be as normal as ever. Starfire and Raven made it to the later, and turned towards a weak- kneed Robin and Beast Boy. Fayrii stopped playing.  
Jack started, "We are gathered here today..." While he spoke, the four titans only half-listened to him. Robin and Starfire were too busy looking at each other, as were Raven and Beast Boy. Jack asked for the presentation of the rings, and the boys took their rings and slid them on the girls' fingers. Then the girls slid the boys' rings on.  
Jack started to talk again, and he got to the part where they say I do. Starfire was asked first. She replied with her eyes shining, "I do."  
Robin was asked next. His voice was a mix of joy and seriousness as he answered, "I do."  
Then it was Raven's turn. Her voice seemed unstable when she spoke, "I do."  
Finally, when Beast Boy was asked, he answered, "I do."  
"Then I pronounce you all men and wives," Jack said, now that it was almost over. "You may now kiss the brides."  
Robin lifted Starfire's, the thing that women wear on their head. Then Beast Boy and Robin kissed Raven and Starfire. The organ struck up, and everyone clapped. After people congratulated, Fayrii walked up to the cake, holding a fine knife. He flipped all over, catching it with his shoe, hands, head, and tail. When he was finished, the cake was precisely cut into fine pieces. Fayrii handed each of the married a slice, then everyone else. Everyone waited for one of them eat.  
Instead, Robin did something else. "Star?" he asked. Starfire turned towards him.  
"Yes Robin?" she answered. Robin threw the piece of cake perfectly on target. Starfire stood there awhile, then threw hers back at a surprised Robin.  
Beast Boy grinned and turned towards a frowning Raven.  
She started, "Don't even think about it." But the cake flew true and landed squarely on her face. However, Beast Boy didn't expect Raven to throw hers however, and it hit him.  
Then chaos erupted. Think about it. You have a whole bunch of teenagers, four of which are getting married, and they just got cake thrown in their faces. Yeah, one of the grooms called food fight. Cake flew everywhere. Mammoth was in a corner, catching and eating cake that came his way.  
The chaos ended when a blast of magic disintegrated the cake Robin was about to throw. An uninvited guest, Mumbo, was on a stage.  
"Hm, what to do?" he asked himself, preparing to ruin the wedding. Fortunately, there were two other magic-users in that cathedral, and one of them was a prankster.  
Fayrii jumped up on the stage, saying, "Well Mumbo, you found out that Robin had scheduled a little entertainment before the final event." Robin hadn't, but he went along with it, to stop chaos.  
Fayrii used magic and spun Mumbo in mid-air, then placed him in a box, and pulled out a katana.  
"It's that I warn you, I have never trained in this weapon," Fayrii said, and brought the katana down through the box. He opened it, and the bottom half of Mumbo jumped up and ran out of the cathedral, while the upper half dragged itself after its legs.  
Finally, Fayrii twirled his finger, and music began to play. Everyone started to dance to the slow tune.  
The wedding song that the four had decided on was one Fayrii had written, successfully containing the four elements that they liked. It started out slow, like a love song. Then came Robin's rock part. The wedding party picked up speed. It meshed into a amusing little tune (BB's), which kept the same rhythm as Robin's. Then it transitioned into a horror/quick one, then slowed back to a slow song, and ended.  
The guests eventually left, leaving the eight Titans to clean up. Fayrii and Jack handled that, while Cyborg got their cameras. Robin was still spinning Starfire around, who was giggle profusely. Raven was holding hands with Beast Boy prancing around in circles.  
By noon, two ships (jet ships) were waiting outside. Raven and Beast Boy got on one, while Robin and Starfire got on another. The two ships flew off in different directions, heading for the couples' honeymoons. Cyborg got in the T-car with the two brothers, and drove home.  
  
(A/N: This story isn't over by a long shot!) 


	6. Surprises

Chapter VI: Surprises  
Cyborg sat on the couch, flipping through the channels. A month since Raven, BB, Starfire, and Robin had been married. They still weren't back from their honeymoons. And Fayrii and Jack had needed to go back to their dimension. Something about a war or the other. So Cyborg had the entire tower to himself. Lately he was learning how boring it was to live alone.  
Cyborg spent most of his time either eating, charging, or talking to Blackfire. Thankfully, the city had been quiet lately. Although Cyborg thought something was up. Cyborg changed channels again to the science channel. A show called 'UFOs: Do They Exist?' was on. Cyborg smiled to himself as pictures of flying saucers were shown. Of course UFOs exist, else where would Starfire, Raven, Fayrii, and Jack come from?  
The narrator changed course, "But then, there are those hideous aliens in Jump City, always causing trouble. Plus two more have been seen. Are we not safe?"  
"Oh yeah? Well screw you!" someone yelled, and a familiar disk smashed into the TV, breaking it. Cyborg turned around to see Robin standing there with Starfire.  
"Wazzup guys?" Cyborg asked. Robin's mood lightened, and he smiled and shook Cyborg's hand.  
"Hey Cyborg," Robin greeted. Starfire flew into them both.  
"Friend Cyborg it is nice to see you!" Starfire said, as hyper as ever.  
"Good to see you too Starfire," Cyborg said, as his gut was being squeezed to death. Starfire let go, and Cyborg took deep breaths.  
"So, you're fixing the TV, right?" Cyborg asked Robin. Robin gave him one of those yeah-right looks. "So, where did you guys go off to?"  
"We traveled to the water enveloped island called Hawaii!" Starfire exclaimed joyfully, "And then we partook in the ritual of..."  
Robin's hand gently covered her mouth, his cheeks slightly red. "That's more than he needs to know, Star," he explained. Starfire blushed. Cyborg showed that evil grin that Robin used when he had just kicked butt.  
"I shall go get our things," Starfire said, and she walked off. Robin watched her go, a bit of drool coming out of the corner of his mouth, until Cyborg picked him up and took him out into the hallway. Cyborg pinned him to the wall.  
"So, what 'ritual' did you partake in, eh Robin?" Cyborg chuckled. Robin glared at him.  
Cyborg continued his teasing, "I'll bet you thoroughly enjoyed your time doing her..." Cyborg didn't get much further before Robin kicked him in the stomach, tripped him, and pinned him to the ground.  
"Don't you even think about talking about Starfire like that again, because if I do, the consequences won't be pleasant," Robin threatened. Cyborg was smart enough to know Robin meant it.  
"But what about you, eh Robin?" Cyborg asked as he got up. Robin's cheeks turned the color of an apple. Cyborg burst out laughing.  
There was a knock heard at the door. The two got up and walked down to open it. On the other side was Raven with Beast Boy.  
"Hey guys, how are ya?" Beast Boy asked.  
"Hey Beast Boy, hey Raven," Robin greeted.  
"Wazzup?" Cyborg asked. Just then, a purple and red blur came flying down the stairs. Starfire hugged Raven and Beast Boy.  
"Friends you have returned!" Starfire shouted.  
"Yeah," Beast Boy choked.  
"You're. Hugging. Me," Raven managed to get out. Starfire let go.  
"Where did you depart for your moon of honey?" Starfire asked.  
"Okinawa," Raven stated simply. The Titans stood there for some time, not entirely sure what to do next.  
"Um, anyone want pizza?" Robin asked. There was a chorus of 'yes' and a 'maybe.' Jumping inside the T-car, the Titans drove down to the pizza parlor.  
Two weeks later, the boys were sitting at the breakfast table, doing what they were supposed to do: eating breakfast. Beast Boy, however, was worried about Raven.  
"C'mon, BB, Raven's probably meditating," Cyborg reassured to a pacing BB.  
"But she would have come down for a cup of herbal tea already," Beast Boy countered. After a few more minutes, Beast Boy left to go check on her.  
"Hey Robin, why aren't you worried about Star; shouldn't she be here by now?"  
  
Cyborg asked.  
"It's the link," Robin answered, "I can sense her in the living room. Plus, I'm feeling happiness from her. While I am curious as to why she's in the living room by herself, she feels alright."  
Suddenly, Robin felt funny. "Now something is wrong," he said, and he got up to leave.  
Starfire was in the living room by herself, holding her stomach. She smiled at him as he sat down next to her, and then lowered her head again.  
"Star, what's wrong?" Robin asked. "Do you have stomach ache?"  
"No," Starfire answered. "It is not an ache of the stomach, but my stomach feels strange."  
Robin sat for a while, running through his head. He didn't quite get it. Starfire sighed.  
"I feel like it is getting bigger," Starfire hinted again. Robin's mind searched again: hmm, getting bigger, it's not fat, Starfire could never be fat, let's see...oh.  
"I...see," Robin answered, understanding dawning. Just then, Beast Boy and Raven walked in. Raven didn't look too comfortable. Starfire and Raven were staring at each other, nodding back and forth. Robin and Beast Boy looked at each other and shrugged. The girls were using Raven's mind speak. After a few minutes, the girls just sat there, so Robin assumed they weren't talking anymore.  
"Um, Star?" he started. She turned back to him, so she hadn't been mind talking then. "Perhaps we should go to the doctor?"  
Just then a snickering was heard coming from the kitchen. Beast Boy and Robin looked at each other, and then snuck off to the kitchen. Painful sounds of, "OW!" "AHHHHH!" were heard from a certain bionic man. The two boys walked back out with a grin on their faces, and a battered Cyborg dragged himself behind them. The five entered the T-car, and drove off to the hospital.  
Upon inspection, the doctor issued his report: both Starfire and Raven were going to be pregnant. Starfire was given commands to not fly, tumble, eat candy, not be hyper, and she probably shouldn't go fight until it was over with. The same thing was for Raven, which wouldn't be too hard for her.  
Two days later, the titans were sitting on the couch, watching TV, when there was a knock heard at the door. A voice sounded through, "ROBIN! YOU LET ME IN THERE RIGHT NOW!" The voice belonged to one person: Batman.  
Robin's face drained all of its color, and he melted on the spot. Slowly, Robin walked over to the door, and he was certain he could hear the funeral march playing. Robin opened the door to see a towering, enraged Batman over him. Batman lifted him up by the shirt.  
"HOW DARE YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT IT WITHOUT TELLING ME! I SHOULD..." Batman's lecture went on for some time. "...UNDERSTAND?"  
A close-to-death Robin nodded his head. Batman dropped him and left, with a muttered, "Congratulations."  
Robin lay on the floor for a while, thinking of his luck. Bad news: Batman had found out about the wedding. Good news: He didn't know two Titans were pregnant. More Bad News: What would happen when he did find out?  
Robin picked himself up and walked over to the couch, and sat back in his seat, his face still pale. Eventually, he returned to normal. 


	7. It is Time

A/N: Sorry it's been a while since an update, my internet connection went haywire.  
  
Chapter VII: It's time  
Robin and Beast Boy in the past few days had become almost impossible to keep away from the girls. Both of them would wait hand and foot on them, and Starfire was certain the only feeling she had had from Robin was concern.  
Five months passed. Cyborg, Starfire, and Raven had begun to wonder if Robin and Beast Boy had been brainwashed. However, today both boys seemed to be partially themselves again. Robin had picked up something he hadn't for a long time: the newspaper. Beast Boy had resurrected his old habit of fighting with Cyborg over food again. To Cyborg, it was good; he had kind of missed fighting with BB.  
"For the last time, I am not eating parts of animals that have been cut out, squeezed free of blood, cooked, and stuffed into packages!" Beast Boy shouted. Robin, who had been chewing on some bacon, spat it out. Starfire decided that she would skip breakfast today, while Raven continued to sip her tea.  
The ordeal of breakfast was finished, and the Titans piled into the car, heading to the hospital. Today the doctor was going to do an X-ray. The T-car pulled to a stop in front of the hospital (it might have spun out if Robin and Beast Boy hadn't insisted on normal speeds). They walked into the hospital and waited outside the X-ray room. The doctor came out, and Raven and Beast Boy went in with him.  
"Well, let's take a look," the doctor said, and he put a...the thingy that looks like a stethoscope except it's like an x-ray camera on Raven's stomach. An image came up on a small screen. The doctor moved the thingy around until it showed the baby's head. Raven and Beast Boy looked at the child. It was sitting there, sucking on its thumb. The doctor moved the thingy again, and then turned it off.  
"Well, you're going to have a boy," the Doctor said. Inside Raven mind, however: a mini BB. That's all I need. A mini BB that also cries, comes with diapers, and drinks milk. On the other hand, it won't be talking or eating tofu for a while.  
The two went back outside, and Starfire and Robin came in. Starfire lay down on the table, and the doctor turned on the camera. Robin stared at the small image. The doctor manipulated it to show the head.  
"Well, it's a girl," the doctor reported. Starfire and Robin smiled. Then the doctor pointed to the screen. Robin and Starfire's smile faded.  
"What's that?" the doctor asked, moving the camera again. Robin studied the screen, but couldn't understand anything it showed. The doctor chuckled.  
"What do you know," the doctor said, "You have twins."  
It was never quite sure who fainted first, Starfire or Robin.  
  
In the next two months, Fayrii and Jack visited again. The two brothers were grinning happily. Then they saw Raven and Starfire, followed by Robin and Beast Boy's reports.  
The first words out of young Jack's mouth were, "You had..." The last word wasn't spoken, Fayrii's hand was quicker. But the older brother's eyes were as wide as dinner plates.  
Later that day, the seven piled into the T-car, going shopping for the new arrivals. They stopped by the mall, and walked in. Cyborg, Jack, Raven and Beast Boy headed to the boys' section, while Fayrii, Robin and Starfire went to the girls section. While they were in the walking path, Fayrii was normal, but as soon as they entered an area, the Half-faerie was holding his breath.  
Starfire wanted to get her girls things that were pink and fluffy. Robin wanted to get something red. Robin didn't want extreme girly-girl daughters, either. When they got old enough, he wanted to personally teach them everything they knew. Starfire wanted to teach them to fly and use starbolts, to enjoy being a girl (the flying and starbolt part Robin was fine with, the girl part, not so much). Fayrii wisely reminded them that they were looking for baby toys, clothes, cribs, and diapers. They decided on a blue and white crib, and red and purple clothing. The toy part was easy. Anything that Robin didn't think would make the babies even think a scared thought was put in the cart. Diapers were next, about ten boxes. Then came carrying things and strollers and whatever I missed.  
Raven and Beast Boy's shopping trip wasn't too difficult either. Beast Boy would let their son be dressed in black and a dark green. They didn't get many toys however, after Raven made a comment about Beast Boy already owning enough. They got a dark green carriage, diapers, dark green and black clothes, and everything else in those colors.  
Fayrii and Jack flew to the tower while levitating everything behind them. Everyone else file into the car. They reached home, and everything was put in a place. Robin settled down next to Starfire to read a book, Fayrii and Jack went downstairs, Cyborg turned on the TV, Raven decided to meditate, while Beast Boy went to follow Raven. Downstairs, Fayrii and Jack descended into the basement, and locked the door behind them.  
After making sure no one was listening, Jack asked, "Is it time?"  
Fayrii nodded, "It's time." The two boys used white magic to create a glowing orb. Then channeling their psychic energy into it, they put a spell of good luck upon the Tower.  
Two more months later, an argument was ensuing. Fayrii, Cyborg, Jack, were standing by the door, waiting for Robin and Beast Boy to go, who refused to move from the girls on the couch.  
"I'm not going anywhere," Robin said, folding his arms and saying it for the twentieth time.  
"I will be alright Robin," Starfire assured. Robin shook his head.  
"Robin and I aren't going anywhere," Beast Boy answered, his arms folded and his eyes closed.  
"Please Robin?" Starfire asked, and made a puppy dog pout. Robin stared at her for a while, and then tore his eyes away. But the image stayed in his mind, and he dropped his arms and head in defeat, and then walked over to the waiting boys.  
Raven looked to Beast Boy, who began to defend himself, "It's gonna take more a face to pry me away..." Beast Boy was cut off as Raven kissed him. He walked dizzily for while, put his finger in the air, and said, "I'll be back in a minute," before hitting the ground. They other boys helped him up, and they left.  
At the pizza parlor, where the boys were ordering lunch, Robin and Beast Boy were relaxing, beginning to finally the grasp the fact that the girls didn't need them 24/7 (about nine months late, Cyborg muttered).  
Everything was going fine, until Robin suddenly hit the ground, holding his stomach in pain.  
"Robin, what's wrong?" Cyborg asked as they all ran over to him.  
"It's not me," Robin grunted, "It's Starfire. It's a contraption." Immediately, Fayrii and Jack picked up Robin by the arms and flew the five of them over to the Tower. Sure enough, when they got there, Starfire was in a contraption. The T-car never gone so fast when it zoomed to the hospital. Starfire was rushed into a room with Robin next to her. Another doctor came out and advised Raven to stay here in a different room. She and BB went into a different room. Cyborg, Fayrii, and Jack were left out in the waiting room. Cyborg paced about, Fayrii tried to keep himself busy playing a energy game, while Jack simply waited patiently in a seat.  
Robin stood next to Starfire, holding his stomach. The pain vanished. Another contraption done with. Starfire grabbed his hand. Robin managed a smile. Another contraption came, Robin found himself in a problem. Starfire grip was hurting his hand. In return, Starfire felt the pain from him and tightened her grip. So Robin's hand was slowly being crushed harder and harder.  
The doctor decided it was time, and Starfire was instructed to push. She doubted she could, yet the doctor thought she was doing perfectly. Sometimes it paid to be super-strong.  
"We have one!" the doctor shouted. A crying was heard, and the doctor took a screaming baby girl out and handed it to a nurse, who started to dry it off. Starfire was instructed to push again, and the doctor took out a second crying baby girl. The two babies were dried off, and handed to a happy Starfire and Robin. Starfire was smiling and had tears; Robin was also smiling and slightly laughing. He cradled the crying baby in his arms, and couldn't do anything else but smile at the precious one in his arms.  
  
Meanwhile, about the time Starfire had begun to push, Raven had gone into labor. It was a very painful thing, and Raven was frequently having thoughts about killing Beast Boy. Beast Boy stood panicking.  
"Beast Boy," she asked.  
"Yes Raven?" he answered.  
"Can you get me a glass of water?"  
"Of course," he replied, and ran off. Beast Boy headed down to the waiting room, filled a glass of water, and came running back. However, the doctor didn't know he was coming, and so when he opened the door fast, it came in contact with Beast Boy very unfriendly.  
WHAM! Beast Boy, knocked in the head, fell to ground. The doctor saw him, and picked him up, running back in.  
"Sorry, but your husband's been knocking partially unconscious," the doctor explained, putting Beast Boy in a pull-out bed next to Raven's.  
"What does that mean?" Raven asked.  
Partially knocked out BB answered by saying, "I want a cookie."  
"Alright, you need to push this time!" the doctor ordered. Raven began to push, and Beast Boy started singing some song (You can't blame him, he's been partially knocked out).  
While BB was singing, he looked down where the baby was coming, and shouted, "WHOA!"  
"SHUT UP!" Raven yelled, and Beast Boy leaned back on his stretcher. After a few minutes, a baby boy rested in Raven's arms.  
  
The girls had been moved into the same room, and the boys filed in silently. Starfire was beaming with the twins in her arms, and Raven was slightly smiling with her son in her arms.  
Fayrii wanted to know immediately, "What are their names?"  
"The one in my right arm is Whitefire, and the one in my left arm is Bluefire," Starfire answered happily.  
"His name," Raven stated, "is Mirgath." (A/N: My creation!)  
Whitefire and Bluefire looked identical. They both had skin Starfire's color, and small amounts of red hair could be seen. The difference between the two was Whitefire's eyes were white, while Bluefire's eyes were deep blue. Mirgath had skin like Raven's, yet had hair and eyes like Beast Boy. Currently he was staring off at the ceiling.  
Robin took Bluefire from Starfire. She does have my eyes, Robin thought to himself.  
"So you're Bluefire, eh?" Robin asked the little baby. A leaky sound was heard, and Robin's smile faded "And you peed on me."  
Cyborg spoke up, "Alright Fayrii and Jack, let's go and wait in the T- car." Jack and Fayrii reluctantly followed. 


	8. Mini Mayhem

A/N: I have to go to camp for a while, so don't expect lots of updates for a week. (NOOOOOO!)

**Chapter VIII: Mini Mayhem**

The girls stayed in the hospital for a few days, and then the doctor allowed them to come home. Robin and Beast Boy stole the T-car and drove to the hospital, getting Starfire, Raven, Bluefire, Whitefire, and Mirgath in the car. Robin jumped behind the wheel, and gently drove them home. Fayrii and Jack were literally bouncing off the walls to see and possibly hold the babies.

"We're hoooooooome!' Beast Boy shouted when they entered the door. Raven sat down on the couch, Mirgath staring at his new surroundings.

However, the young newborns' first hour at the tower did not go as smoothly as expected. Mirgath seemed to have inherited Raven's psychic powers. He would think-speak baby thoughts to everyone as though he was talking. It was somewhat strange to hear a baby tell you he needs his diaper changed.

Plus, remember in "Switched," when Starfire said that even newborns knew how to fly? Well, Bluefire and Whitefire were flying around at a few inches height. Robin and Starfire were running around trying to keep them still. To make matters worse, Raven had been diagnosed with a big problem for her: temporarily emotional.

Robin ran up after Bluefire. "Bluefire, come back," Robin called. The baby continued to fly around. Of course, she can't understand English yet, Robin thought. He continued to run after his daughter. Jumping, he caught her and spun in the air, landing on his back with Bluefire being held on his stomach. The tiny baby giggled at Robin's feat. Robin smiled at the newborn, and stood up, carrying the precious cargo in his arms.

Starfire sat already on the couch, Whitefire under a purple blanket and feeding. Raven was sitting nearby, her cloak wrapped around her and Mirgath while he fed. She was constantly muttering, "Don't bite me. Don't bite me. Don't bite me."

Cyborg had tricked Beast Boy into playing Halo. Currently, Cyborg was walking through the level, chasing after BB. Fayrii and Jack immediately walked up to Robin and tried to take Bluefire from him. Yet Robin kept hold on his child, and a disappointed Fayrii and Jack walked over to Cyborg and Beast Boy, joining them in a game of Halo. Robin sat down next to Starfire, and they switched babies. Now Robin had Whitefire.

"Robin when are we going to sing our babies to sleep?" Starfire asked. Robin thought for a minute, and then checked the clock.

"Probably in two hours," he answered her, and looked back down at Whitefire. He gave the white-eyed newborn his index finger. She grabbed it, like most babies, and proceeded to put it in her mouth. Naturally, Robin tried to pull his finger away. But he found that he couldn't. He tugged a little harder, but Whitefire held it firmly in her grasp, sucking on his finger and squeezing it. Robin saw his finger losing it color.

The kid has one heck of a grip, Robin thought, and proceeded to use all his strength to get his finger away. It finally popped out red and swollen. Whitefire giggled at the look of pain on Robin's face. It took all his willpower not to shout out loud.

A shout of triumph came from the TV. Cyborg had beaten the other three, and doing a victory dance. He shouted again, and the three babies began to cry. There came a unanimous "Shhhh!" from everyone, and Cyborg blushed, before sitting back down quietly. Fayrii jumped up and lowered the volume to minimal,

The rest of the two hours went smoothly, with no loud noise, dirty diapers, or crying, but Mirgath did a lot of thought-speaking.

_I'm hungry _he called out. Raven looked down at him.

_But you just ate _she answered. Mirgath seemed to think for a while.

_I did? _

_Yes, you did. I know because you were biting me _

_What's the yellow thing? _

_You mean the yellow thing surrounded by red stuff? _

_Uh, yeah _

_It's called the sun. It helps you see _

_WAAAAAAHHHH! It hurt me! _

_Don't look straight at it _

_What's straight? _

_Right in front of you. How did you know yellow and red if you didn't know straight? _

_Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... _

_Never mind _

_What's that? _

_Don't think about it _

_Mommy, I'm sleepy _

_Then go to sleep _

_I can't, I'm scared _

_What's scaring you? _

_The big blue thingy _

_I'll get rid of him. His name is Cyborg _

_He's still scary. And fat. Can you tell him to go away? _

_I will _Raven answered.

"Hey big blue scary and fat thing called Cyborg," Raven called. Cyborg, mouth open, stood up and faced her. Fayrii, having used a future sense, sat chuckling.

"You're disturbing Mirgath from sleeping. He wants you to leave," Raven answered.

Cyborg was about to say Raven was lying, but he told by Mirgath, _That's right you big fat blue thingy, leave me alone! _

Everyone chuckled at Cyborg, who stormed off to his room, angry he was insulted by a baby who wasn't even a month old. BB turned off the game station (it's a sign of the apocalypse! AHHHH!) and sat next to Raven. The time passed, and it was time to head off to that sweet paradise called bed. Fayrii and Jack simply fell asleep on the couch. Starfire and Robin carried Whitefire and Bluefire into their crib, and set them down. Starfire hummed a Tamaranian folksong, which was different that what Robin expected. Most of the time, Tamaranian folksongs were loud and not too easy on his ears. But this one was soothing, peaceful, and carried some sort of spell with it. Robin felt his eyelids drooping, and looked next to him at Starfire, and blinked. Then he remembered nothing.


	9. Horrors of Babysitting

**Chapter IX: The Horrors of Babysitting**

"Why can't we just take us and them with you?" Robin begged Starfire on his knees. Raven and Starfire were leaving to go get those forgetful items. Naturally, the boys didn't want to be left home with three newborns, and were begging for all of them to come. The girls were smarter though, and knew you don't take a newborn with you shopping. So the boys' desperate attempt was in vain.

"Lover Robin, it will be bad for Whitefire and Bluefire if they go outside. They might get sick. You do not want them sick, do you?" Starfire asked, and watched Robin's face go from red to purple to blue to green to pink and so on. Starfire thought she saw gold in there. Inside Robin's mind, two forces were battling. One didn't want the babies to be hurt in any way. The other wanted to go with Starfire and not baby sit. Starfire decided to give the latter an advantage.

She slid into his arms and smiled brightly, stroking his cheek. Robin's face stopped changing colors, and he froze. She smiled a moment longer then curiously tapped him. Robin fell over, knocked out cold.

A laugh came from behind her. Starfire turned to see Raven laughing, which frightened her somewhat.

"You gave him a heart attack most likely, Starfire. I think that was too much of a touch," Raven explained. Starfire took one more glance at Robin and saw he was smiling slightly. She smiled, and the two turned to leave.

"No!" The girls turned to see Cyborg, Beast Boy, and Fayrii being held psychically by Jack, who didn't mind babysitting (unlike the others, he had training in it; Fayrii had as well except he slept through it). The girls waved, and left. Jack let them go, knowing it was over. The four stood about uncertainly.

"Well, what next?" Cyborg asked.

"Maybe we should go poke Robin," Beast Boy suggested. Fayrii walked over and gave Robin a light kick (which sent him flying across the room). Robin woke up.

"Huh, where'd they go?" Robin asked.

"Starfire sorta gave you the touch and you got a heart attack," Fayrii answered, helping him on his feet.

"Oh yeah," Robin said, an unconscious smile spreading across his face, "I could live off that forever." Apparently he could, because his knees were getting wobbly thinking about it.

"Like you lived off her one night one her honeymoon?" Beast Boy asked. Both Cyborg and Beast Boy laughed hysterically.

Robin looked ready to murder, so Fayrii stepped in between. However, Robin only answered, "So did you off Raven."

That got Beast Boy to stop, but not Cyborg.

Then Mirgath sent them all a message, _ HELP! WE NEED HELP _

All five boys never moved faster. They ran up to the living room, where they were. At first, it seemed peaceful.

"What's the problem, Mirgath?" Beast Boy asked his son. Then everyone's nose discovered the problem: All three of them had managed to fill their diapers.

Fayrii dropped dead instantly, and Cyborg's sensors showed that he might as well have sniffed a gallon of pure ammonium.

Everyone else covered their nose with their shirt, except for Cyborg, and he grabbed a cup and put it over it. Cyborg and Robin started to change the twins' diapers, while Beast Boy tried to change Mirgath's. Jack tried to fan his brother back to life.

"Where are the diapers?" Robin shouted.

"I don't know!" Cyborg returned.

"By the fridge!" Beast Boy answered.

Robin ran to the kitchen counter with Bluefire, and BB and Cy ran over with Whitefire and Mirgath. Then a thud noise was heard. The six looked over to see Jack had fallen dead too. Apparently, Half-faeries' noses are very sensitive, and if it could drive a man insane, I pity Jack and Fayrii.

"I got an idea!" BB shouted, and he pulled out a pot with a grid, setting Mirgath in it. Cyborg resorted to using a portable vet table, while Robin used three layers of blankets.

Beast Boy turned into a squid and using two tentacles, he picked up Mirgath. With another two, he took the diaper off (A/N: Writing this is making me smell it, ugh). He immediately tossed the diaper in the garbage cane. He missed, and it contents, ah what the heck, the crap flew everywhere and got on Cyborg, BB, and Robin.

"BEAST BOY!" Cyborg and Robin shouted simultaneously.

"Sorry!" was BB's only reply. Two tentacles continued to hold the baby high, while the rest tried to clean up with baby wipes.

Cyborg put Whitefire on the table, and slid the diaper off. He made it in the trash can. Then he held Whitefire over the sink, and used the hose to clean her bottom.

"Don't do that to my daughter!" Robin yelled angrily. Whitefire didn't look as though she was enjoying it. Cyborg put the hose away and laid Whitefire back on the table, and began to look for wipes.

Robin had gotten Bluefire's diaper off, but was having trouble cleaning her bottom with the wipes.

Then the worst case scenario happened.

The TV flashed on, and the three titans looked at it. It was Slade.

"Good morning, Titans," Slade started, "How would you…" He stopped as he took in the crap-covered Titans with three babies and two knocked out Half-faeries. At this moment, Fayrii woke up.

Slade began to laugh hysterically, and the Titans stared.

"Oh hearing you got married was amusing, but this is precious!" Slade laughed.

Angry at him, Fayrii's turned blue.

A camera came up. Slade held it and took a picture, laughing. Then Slade looked up, and the Titans saw Slade suddenly hit by a large anvil. The TV turned off.

The Titans stood a while, and then continued to change diapers. Fayrii got up and woke up Jack, and they helped.

Somehow, they managed to change the babies' diapers, clean up everything, and not destroy the world. Quite an accomplishment for my gender, eh?

They proceeded to the couch, and sat down. Jack slipped in a little kid move, called The Emperor's New Groove (Warning: if you have not seen this, you must. It is a top-rate comedy that anyone will enjoy).

When it ended, they played with the three newborns. Mirgath was asking his father, Fayrii, and Cyborg about girls, who gave surprisingly good answers.

Then Mirgath suddenly faded through the floor, thinking, _ Ha-ha! Bluefire, Whitefire and I decided to play hid and look. You won't be able to find us _

Bluefire and Whitefire flew off in different directions, and the five boys looked at each other.

"Cyborg, Beast Boy, and Fayrii, look for Mirgath and Whitefire," Robin ordered, his tone shaky, "Jack you come with me to find Bluefire."

Frightened of trouble, they set out to find them. Robin slowly slid into the shadows, and followed a trail along the floor, which consisted of slight tuffs of diaper. Robin normally would have missed them since they were so small they seemed like mouse crumbs. But the adrenaline going through him bettered his vision. Jack followed silently, green psy filling his eyes as he looked around.

This was going to be trouble.


	10. Horrors of Babysitting Pt 2

**Chapter X: Horrors of Babysitting Pt. 2**

Robin and Jack continued to follow the trail of diaper tuff. The adrenaline was still rushing through Robin's veins, so it was easy to spot the trail. It trailed downstairs to the gym. Robin motioned to Jack to split here. Jack nodded, and flew into the air Raven's style, before turning invisible. Having lost sight of Jack, Robin continued on his own.

A quiet scuffle came from behind some weights. Robin allowed himself a smirk before he silently crept forward. Batman had taught him to never underestimate his opponent, but Robin knew that was when you were after anyone who was over a month old. After all, whoever was there was just a newborn right?

Robin continued to creep forward, and looked over the weights. He saw Bluefire enjoying herself by swinging a 200lb. weight before it him smack in the face. He flew back into the air ten feet and landed on his back with a grunt. Bluefire burst out laughing, and Robin was barely able to see Bluefire fly away, while he just laid there, his face smashed and bleeding and his back broken.

Meanwhile, Fayrii, Beast Boy, and Cyborg were having no luck. Fayrii had stopped walking by now and was hovering, his hood off. Eventually, they ended up by the kitchen. Beast Boy now threw his hands up and made his appeal to the heavens distressed, "No! I've lost my son! I'm doomed! Doomed, doomed, doomed, doomed!"

"Easy BB, it's not the end of the world," Cyborg commented.

"Yes it is! Raven's gonna kill me! And since she's emotionally distressed, she's gonna raise me from the dead and kill me again!" BB cried out. Cyborg and Fayrii paused a while to consider this. Then it dawned on them that they would be killed too.

All three of them began searching faster.

"I wonder if Raven's thinking about us right now," Beast Boy mumbled gloomily.

"I've been thinking of what Beast Boy is doing right now," Raven said to Starfire as they walked around, looking for what they needed.

"Do not worry, friend Raven," Starfire assured her. "I think they will be able to sit the babies."

Jack returned to visibility and zoomed over to Robin. "Robin! Are you alright? What happened?" he asked, healing Robin.

"I got hit by Bluefire," Robin mumbled, standing up. Jack looked at him funny.

"She hit me with a giant weight," Robin explained, looking around. "She went this way!"

Robin and Jack jogged down the hallway. A trail of diaper tuff led upstairs, to the roof. Robin's face lost all color, and he darted up, Jack gliding behind him. The roof door was open, and Robin darted over to the edge. Jack glided next to him.

"Did you think she fell?" Robin asked desperately.  
"Don't worry, Robin," Jack assured. "Even if Bluefire did go over the edge, she would fly and catch herself. She's pretty smart for her age."

Robin looked down. "Yeah, but what if…"

"Bluefire!" Jack exclaimed, turning around. A little Bluefire was sitting behind them, looking cute.

Robin turned around, to see her, but as he did, he took a step back into midair. Robin fell back and started to fall down the tower. He was too surprised to react, but simply fell, looking up. Unfortunately for Robin, Jack hadn't noticed him.

"Well, you have been trouble," Jack chided the baby as he picked her up and rocked her in his arms. "Wouldn't you agree, Robin? Robin? Robin, where are you?"

Jack turned and looked down in time to see Robin hit the ground. Jack made a pained face, and carried the infant down to see his father.

Cyborg and Beast Boy followed Fayrii through the tower, unaware of Robin's sudden descent. They all walked to the main room. Here Whitefire and Mirgath were found.

"Yes! Mirgath! It's you!" Beast Boy cheered, running forward to pick up his son. Unfortunately, Mirgath had not seen them, and had turned into a grizzly cub. Mirgath somersaulted forward, and instead of reaching his son, Beast Boy slammed into the window, triggering a defense system. A sonic cannon unfolded itself from the wall and blasted Beast Boy for a minute, then folded itself away again. Beast Boy was ashes.

Carefully, Cyborg tried to tip-toe forward. Whitefire picked him up and slammed him into the ground a couple times, then throwing him out an open window like a rag doll (one must remember that Mirgath was scared of Cyborg, and could mind talk with Whitefire).

Fayrii was not an idiot. So he climbed into a ceiling corner, and stayed there, frightened. The infants had no motive to leave, so continued to sit there and make baby noises. Since he didn't know what to do, Fayrii began consulting _The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy_, a wholly remarkable book. In it he was given an answer: just sit there.

Coincidentally, a _The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy_ book appeared out of a wormhole from ten years in the future, saying:

_This book is a wholly remarkable book. It contains all your needs and information wants. In fact, this book is a better guide than the _Encyclopedia Galactica_, not a wholly remarkable book. Even better, this book showed Crown Prince Fayrii Lijaro how to survive babysitting on Earth, which had been thought to be mostly harmless._

Starfire and Raven walked into the quiet tower. It seemed strange, but they ignored it and walked into the TV room. Jack was the only one who could greet them. The three babies were sleeping in cradles. Robin was in an iron lung. Beast Boy was being reconstructed by DNA specialists. Cyborg was being built together by mechanics. Fayrii sat huddled in corner, rocking back and forth.

The girls dropped their things and ran over. "Jack, what has occurred?" Starfire asked.

"Robin fell off the tower, Cyborg was ripped apart by Whitefire, Beast Boy was blasted by a sonic cannon, and Fayrii was driven to the edge of insanity," Jack replied in a matter-of-fact tone.  
"Perhaps the boys should have gone shopping…" Raven mumbled. Starfire nodded her head in agreement.


	11. Small Scale Trouble

**Chapter XI Revised: Small Scale Trouble**

Robin woke up in the middle of the night, fully alert. He immediately knew something was wrong. Quickly he dashed down the hallway, making no noise. Around corners he went, waking nothing. Finally he found the door he was looking for, and thrust it open.

Then Robin closed it behind him and went to the bathroom.

Somewhere else in the tower, Fayrii woke up for no reason. He yawned, and went back to sleep. It was a pity he didn't notice the figures hiding in the shadows. The figures raised weapons and shot. Tranquilizer darts shot forth and stung the two brothers. Later the figures would learn that the tranquilizer didn't affect them at all; they stayed asleep of their own accord. But they didn't know it now, and they sped along hallways. They silently stepped into Cyborg's room. One of them shut off Cyborg's recharge machine. Then they made their way to Raven and Beast Boy's room. Darts were fired, and there was a flash.

The figures dashed to Robin and Starfire's room. There were darts shot, followed by another flash. Their mission accomplished, the figures flew towards the exit. They stopped at the sound of a toilet ahead. A door opened, and Robin stepped out. He looked at the figures. It was dead silent for a moment, as a half-asleep Robin tried to contemplate why there was a field trip in his tower. Then he spotted his daughters in one of the figure's arms. The figure realized where Robin was looking. He looked around frightened, and then gave the babies to someone else.

Robin's voice bellowed throughout the tower, "KIDNAPPERS! SOMEONE IS KIDNAPPING THE BABIES!"

Instantly there was howling as those were formerly asleep charged towards Robin's voice. Robin's Bo staff was out, and he flung himself forward, slashing at the first guy he could with it. The figures moved to defend themselves against the charging Titans who had joined Robin. Beast Boy changed into a tiger and leaped at a figure, now identified as a robot. Cyborg's cannon shot forward ripping through ranks. Raven's psychic powers lost control and began to shred anything she saw. Starfire in her rage forgot about her starbolts and threw robots out of the way. The robots were beset upon by such ferocity that hadn't been seen before.

And still the babies were asleep.

But the tranquilizers from before were kicking in. The Titans were slowing down. They weren't as fast. Guns were released and lasers burst through the air. Robin continued to fight strong, not having been tranquilized. Darts began to fly with the lasers. A couple hit Robin, and he began to slow as well. Finally a laser finished him, knocking him out. The robots' numbers were half of what they had been. But they had won. Now that they wouldn't run into trouble, they walked towards the exit. The door opened to show Fayrii and Jack. Fayrii was in his white and black, Jack in his white.

"Brother," Jack said coldly. "I think I'm about to break my training."

"I don't blame you," Fayrii answered. They shrieked in foreign tongues and threw themselves at the robots. Black magic burst from the older brother's hand, while Jack used white magic to send a crippling field of electricity through them. Their psychic powers combined and formed into a bluish-green monster head. The head shredded through robots before exploding. In retaliation the robots fired darts. They hit the brothers.

Fayrii lifted a hand and walked forward, shouting. The robots came in range, and he swiped, ripping through them. Then the robots parted and to show a giant plasma cannon facing Fayrii. It fired. The plasma shot forth and knocked him out in one blow. Jack looked at his brother before looking back at the cannon. It fired again. Jack made a psychic shield. The plasma smashed into the shield. Jack was slowly driven back, before the plasma burst through the shield and slammed Jack into the wall, knocking him out.

Only 24 of 297 robots remained. But the babies were **still** asleep, and they left the tower, carrying their prisoners with them.

Beast Boy moaned as he got up. The sun was shining directly in his face. _Odd, _BB thought, _Raven usually wants me to keep the curtains closed._ Then he opened his eyes, and remembered what had happened the night before. He hopped to his feet, and saw Raven.

"Raven!" he shouted kneeling beside her. Raven moaned as she rose. She looked at Beast Boy. Then she looked around. Robin and Starfire were getting their feet. Cyborg was sitting up. Everyone's mind started working.

Robin flew through the doors of the tower, his Bo staff in hand. He knew who had done it: Slade. Only he could be so cold. Once he found him, Robin was going to put him through such pain that he'll beg to have never existed.

_ Lover Robin> _Starfire asked. Her feelings were black.

_ Yes?> _Robin asked.

_ You will not do those things to Slade. I'm going to> _Starfire said.

"First one to him wins," Beast Boy said, walking forward. Cyborg looked at the walls.

"It won't be these two," he said. The other four came to see what he meant. Fayrii and Jack were still unconscious against the walls.

"Don't worry about them," Robin said. "I'm certain they'll understand." He turned to look at the city. "Right now we have bigger meat to kill."

The babies looked around, scared. They were locked in a cradle, with laser shields preventing them from getting out. Bluefire spotted someone off to the right. Slade walked forward out of the shadows, and sat in a chair.

"Good morning, my new apprentices," Slade said. The babies cowered a little, and Slade laughed.


	12. Apalling Anarchy

**Chapter XII: Appalling Anarchy**

The babies cowered under Slade's derisive smile. Mirgath instantly knew something was wrong. He was not where he was supposed to be, wherever that was. So he stared back at Slade with a blank stare. Bluefire was starting to cry softly; Whitefire was looking around fearful. Slade seemed to grow darker at the infant's fear.

"I suppose you are wondering what is happening," Slade said. "Here is what will happen. You will forget about your origins and be my apprentices to help me rule the world. When I'm old I'll poison you so you don't rebel against me, and I'll bury you in Mexico because it sounds cool. While you're my apprentices you'll be subject to my every whim and torture I bestow upon you. Deal?"

Mirgath sent one thought: _What's origin mean?> _

"This is going to take awhile," Slade mumbled. Bluefire realized they were in enemy hands. Whitefire stared angrily at Slade. Mirgath found he had to pee.

* * *

"Officer!" Robin shouted. The policeman turned to see the Titans advancing towards him. "Alert the city. Three newborns have been kidnapped."

"Um, I'm not who you want to see," the person responded. "I'm just disguised as a policeman." Robin jumped on him and pinned him.

"Why are you disguised?" Robin asked. The man swallowed nervously.

"I'm hiding from wandering salesman," he whispered. Robin got off him. A salesman came running up. Screaming the man ran off. The salesman hopped in a car with other salesman and drove after the guy. The salesman started to chuck sales forms at the man, and he suffered a heart attack. The ambulance came to take him away, and police fought off the salesman.

"Crime has reached a new level," Raven muttered. Then Robin spotted someone very familiar.

"Batman!" Robin shouted, and he ran to him. "Slade has kidnapped some…"

"Whoa there, Robin," Adam West said. "I only play him in the movies. But I bribe the phone company to put Batman as my name in the phone book, and they told me Slade's in there." Then he walked off to make fun of himself in some other story.

_ Lover Robin, something is strange> _Starfire thought.

_ I know what you mean> _Robin responded. Beast Boy interrupted any further conversation by shouting.

"Let's give it a try!" he said, and the Titans ran to the nearest phone book.

"Let's see," Cyborg muttered, flipping through the pages. "Sandler, Adam; Simpson, Ashley; Simpson, Homer; Simpson, Jessica; Here it is! Slade, Relish! Wait, Relish!"

"No wonder he's evil…" Robin mumbled.

"Where does he live?" Raven pressed.

Cyborg answered. "He lives at…"

* * *

The babies were enclosed in a room, with Slade sitting in front of them. A chalkboard was behind him. Slade grabbed a piece of chalk.

"Alright," he said. "Here how it goes." He drew the babies on the board. "The three of you will…"

_ Which one is me?> _Mirgath asked. _I can't tell; they're all stick figures> _

"It doesn't matter," Slade said. "Now, you…"

_ Huh, well that's nice> _Mirgath muttered. _Whitefire says if you went through all the trouble of kidnapping us you could at least draw us properly. And that means no faults> _

"Now I know why I went after Robin…" Slade mumbled.

* * *

"…In Paris!" Cyborg shouted. "What's he doin' there!"

"Makes sense actually," Robin muttered. "France loses all the time, he loses all the time."

"What do you got against France, dude?" Beast Boy yelled.

"Nothing," Robin countered. "They just lose all the time."

"Why are you arguing, friends?" Starfire asked. "Our children are in danger. How can we go to this France that never wins?"

"C'mon, we're going to the airport," Cyborg said. They all hopped in the T-car (which appeared out of nowhere) and drove to an airport. It didn't occur to them that they could make the T-sub fly over there. They arrived at the airport and walked to the desk attendant.

"Excuse me," Robin said. "Could we get a flight to Paris?"

"I'm sorry," the desk attendant said. "All flights to Paris have been shot down. France isn't accepting any flights over there. They are angry with us. They claim that President Bush insults them too much."

"Flamin' Republican!" Robin shouted. Starfire wasn't sure what he meant, but anger was radiating from him. The link was overpowering.

"Wait," Raven said. "Why don't we take a military plane?" Instantly the T-car appeared inside the airport, and they took off for Fort Jackson in Tennessee, breaking the speed limit at 1,002 mph (at which they could have driven over the Atlantic).

They ran up to the flight officer. "Sir, could we take a flight to Paris?" Raven asked. The officer shook his head.

"Sorry, ma'am, but the Army, Navy, Air Force, and Marines only have 30 men total, and our only equipment is wooden sticks. The reason for it is John Kerry just became President, and he nearly disbanded the Military to please other countries."

"Pathetic Democrat…" Raven hissed.

"How are we supposed to get there now?" Starfire asked. She sensed brightness from Robin.

"I got an idea!" he said.

* * *

"Alright!" Slade shouted. "Now that you've been drawn to perfection, taught why adults are stupid, why the dumb ones wear masks like mine, why idiots dress like I do, had your diapers changed, and learned why mindless freaks kidnap babies, let's…" Slade now realized what these lectures meant. They were proving him stupid. The babies laughed.

Slade's face reddened beneath the mask. He had just proven himself stupid. In fact, at one point he had proven himself to have an IQ lower than that of a rock's, which meant his was negative. He built up rage.

"ENOUGH!" he shouted. The babies froze. "YOU ARE GOING TO LISTEN TO ME! UNDERSTAND!" Slade picked up Mirgath and stared at him. There was a leaky noise, and Slade's expression dropped. He put Mirgath down, and went to find some paper towels. The babies erupted back into laughter.

* * *

_The _Hitchhiker's Guide_ has this to say about stealing:_

_If you're gonna do it, don't get caught. Stealing is considered a heinous crime on many planets (except on Earth as set by Robin Hood and Sir Francis Drake, as well as Spy Network which steal information), and it will get you many long years in prison. However, if you truly feel inclined to you, then here are a few pointers:_

_Don't let anyone know what you are doing. This is a great way to get thrown in Jail. It happened to Zaphod Beeblebrox during one his terms in jail as President._

_Plan out your steal. If it's something like thirty Altairian dollars, then make sure you can maneuver into a situation where you cannot be seen. If it's bigger, then plan when and how._

_Prepare yourself. If you're going to pickpocket, try to cut it loose with something, so the victim does not feel you pushing in the bag. Have equipment or a method for security: camera jammers, dark clothing for lights, digital watches for security guards…_

_If you're caught in the act, and you have your goal, run. If you don't have it, run and come back for it later by giving the victim lots of drinks. Have an escape route ready for a get-away._

_If all else fails, have your towel with you.

* * *

_

"Hey! Somebody stop him!" the guard yelled. "I don't know how!" Robin sprinted towards the Thunderbird, where the rest of the Titans were inside. He had been spotted by an eighth-grade class who thought he was an imposter of Robin, even though he showed them his hero ID. A guard jumped in front of him. Robin hit him in the head, and hopped the Thunderbird as it took the skies.

"Hold on back there," Cyborg said, and the Thunderbird hit Mach 5.

_We're coming,_ Starfire thought. _Please be safe._


	13. Catastrophic Chaos

**Chapter XIII: Catastrophic Chaos**

Robin took a deep breath.

"I can't believe we just stole the Thunderbird from the Smithsonian," he mumbled. Starfire sensed confusion from him, as if he didn't know who he was.

"Hey, what's this button do?" Cyborg said. He pressed it, and the Thunderbird hit Mach 12. He pressed it again. The engines shot forward and ripped off the wings, leaving the jet far behind. Within time they would crash into China and wipe out everyone who saw them except for an old man, and World War III would start.

"The Americans are attacking!" the man said, and Chinese officials readied their knock-off Thompsons, only to be wasted by the U.S. wooden sticks…

"Hey!" Beast Boy shouted. "Can we stay on topic? Our kids have been kidnapped, hello!"

Sorry. Got too much into it.

The Titans now found themselves hovering in midair without any way to stay afloat. Cyborg calculated how fast they were going and discovered they would crash–land in Paris, so it didn't matter. They would smash into the four-legged of wires whose name escapes my memory. The Eiffel Tower, that's it!

"Well, now what?" Raven asked. Cyborg sighed. We have to wait.

* * *

_The _Hitchhiker's Guide_ has this to say about waiting:_

_It sucks.

* * *

_

Slade walked out of the room. He was soaked, cut, bruised, beaten, and pissed. It was enough. He was going to kill the babies, and the Titans when they arrived. All thoughts of an apprentice were wiped from his mind.

He wanted the babies dead. But not before he had his fun. Slade walked over to a microphone. He pressed one of many buttons.

"Slay," he said into the microphone. A shifting noise was heard through a speaker. Slade smiled evilly. "I've got toys for you," he announced. The speaker went wild with scraping noises. Slade laughed evilly. Then he farted.

Somewhere else in Paris, a Frenchman shouted, "I surrender!"

"Holy carp! Wait, I mean crap! Holy Crap!"

Robin arose to the sound of Beast Boy's shouts, and looked out his window. The Eiffel Tower was all around them. In fact, they had hit it awhile ago. Robin unfastened his seatbelt and gritted his teeth. He sensed anger from Starfire. Raven used her powers to break open the door. The Titans hopped down the 57 feet to the bottom, and hopped in the T-car.

"Alright, now where in Paris was he?" Robin asked as he drove to the city limits.

"Actually, Lover Robin," Starfire answered. "It was beneath the Tower of Eiffel." The car stopped, and Robin beat his head into the wheel.

"I hate myself some days," Robin muttered. In Taiwan, someone decided it was time to pee.

The Titans drove back to the Eiffel Tower and hopped out of the T-car, which disappeared back to Fort Jackson. Raven used her powers to find the entrance, and Starfire ripped the hatch open. They hopped down into the base. A doughnut followed, but since it was broken down into sugar by a duck, its story is unimportant. Instead its partner, the cheeseburger, became a hero to food by killing off the power supply to French food places. The food revolted and killed all the French people (including the author unfortunately) by chopping their heads off.

Yes, before you ask, I'm dead. Yes, I am a ghost. No, Horse Radish is not a musical instrument. Mayonnaise is not an instrument either. And vice versa.

Starfire led the search through what appeared to be sewers. They turned left and found metal bars in the way. It was a dead end. Inside was a man in black. A dead man in brown lay on the ground.

"Are you prisoners of Slade?" Starfire asked. The man in black shook his head.

"No, I'm a Sith," he answered. "But I am captured. My fellow…Jedi (kill him, kill him, yesss) died of a…accident. Will you let me go? I haven't had a hot dog in years. I'll give you the lightsabers."

Before could answer, Cyborg let him go. The Sith gave them three lightsabers and ran off. He died a few weeks later of cholesterol poisoning. But back to the lightsabers. There was a single-bladed green, a single-bladed blue, and a double-bladed red. Cyborg hid them and they continued on.

Deeper in the base, Slay was let in with the babies.


End file.
